One of the most powerful things that we can do to take care of ourselves is to look ourselves in the eyes, and say “I love you.” We all have inner critics, which make this process challenging. Even people who have survived the most serious dis-eases have a lot of difficulty looking at themselves and acknowledging how wonderful they are.

We are pure love, with the capacity and the gift to uplift ourselves, heal, rejuvenate, liberate, bless ourselves with the power of love that we are. The power of our love is illuminated by our unique expression of who we are. We compare ourselves to others, but our differences are our true gifts.

When we are young, we are often teased or undermined for those things that make us stand apart, as opposed to being praised for them. The only time we are respected by our differences is if we win a prize, a game, a reward, or some other type of public recognition. But we can look ourselves in the mirror and say “I am fine, just the way I am.”

Being wonderful is not based on what our parents tell us, or what our teachers say, or even what a boss once told us. Being wonderful and capable is due to the love of our souls and the universe of absolute good that conspires without ceasing to bless us. We were called to be our authentic selves before were formed in the womb. Our responsibility is to love ourselves as the fullest expression of our callings and be our best selves.

Looking at ourselves face to face and acknowledging that we love ourselves just the way we are is not being narcissistic; it is quite the opposite. Narcissists dislike themselves and “suffer from pathological envy which means that anything you’re better at than them will eventually be a subject of denigration rather than praise. . . . They want to demonstrate you are worthless and that you are their property— often simultaneously. . . .Narcissists keep harems because they love to have their egos stroked and they need constant validation from the outside world to confirm their grandiose sense of self-importance and fulfill their need for excessive admiration.”

Shahida Arabi, from POWER: Surviving and Thriving After Narcissistic Abuse

Looking deeply into our own eyes, souls, and gifts is about loving ourselves without the need for validation or admiration from others.


How do I love you, the poet asks, let me count the ways.

We can look into our own eyes and say “the ways are endless. I love you without ceasing – from the beginning of creation until the end of time.”

“The direct experience of Spirit itself being pure love is the same knowledge that a baby begins with, in a voice that we have long forgotten, which says I am love. In the Spirit, we are unbounded by time and space, untouched by experience.” (Deepak Chopra)

When most of us say “I love you,” we act as though we are bartering – giving something away of great value in exchange for something else – instead of realizing that we are simply being the image and likeness of a presence and a power that “never, ever fails.”(1 Corinthians 13:4)

Looking into the mirror of our love
allows us to see the divine,
which is greater than we could ever imagine ourselves to be.

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